Priceless
Alex Salmond
paid my wages!
To some he was a towering 21st century Braveheart; yet for others, he merely peddled political myths of a fantasy Brigadoon that possibly lay over the horizon. Yet the recent sudden and unexpected passing of Alex Salmond, shook many who either revered, or reviled him.
After hearing of his death, my mind raced back to personal memories I have of the late SNP & Alba leader. Though if you are expecting a deep analysis of the political complexities of Holyrood and Scottish nationalism, you will be best placed looking elsewhere. Many have covered those areas with far greater authority than myself.
In fact, my most recent memory occurred back in August, during the height of the Edinburgh Fringe. I bought a ticket to see those two combative political journalists Andrew Pierce and Kevin Maguire cross verbal swords in front of a packed audience. Like former footballers from a bygone era, they are renowned for attacking the opposing forces from both right-wing and left-wing positions.
Just before the proceedings began proper, who calmly walked on stage (like a jovial Caledonian MC) than none other than Alex Salmond. The leader of the Alba party (channelling a bit of Andrew Neil into the proceedings) was now the genial host, presiding over the next hour of semi-humorous debate; whilst making sure that all was orderly and above board.
Many subjects were covered and aired that day including: the recent riots, Brexit, the new Labour government, Scottish independence, the scrapping of the winter fuel payments, and the present relevance of the monarchy. One lady in the audience displayed her growing agitation towards Mr Pierce, so much so that for one brief moment I thought she was about to chuck her paper coffee cup straight at him!
All this time, Mr Salmond (with a wicked, mischievous glint in his eye) received the biggest laugh of the show, announcing to all in attendance, that Harry & Meghan were planning on returning to the UK, to set up a new home in the Scottish Highlands! I wonder if anyone there believed him?
I first properly became aware of Mr Salmond throughout the bulk of the 1990s.
During that decade, he was a regular and welcome visitor to the old BBC Edinburgh studios at 5 Queen Street, contributing to a number of political and current affairs programs. Glancing back, it was a close-run thing as to whether he, or writer Iain Rankin, would appear (with increasing predictability) through the building’s front doors.
Yet, unlike the majority of the then Scottish politicians - who could be a right sour-faced, miserable and downright grumpy bunch - Mr Salmond was always friendly, relaxed and affable. Unlike the above, he didn’t brusquely demand free coffee, free newspapers or free use of BBC telephones etc.
As far as I was aware, he was wearing his own suit, his own glasses and didn’t attempt to scrounge free tickets for a Proclaimers concert! So numerous were his visits back then, that I half expected to see him turn up for the BBC Christmas lunch, with a wide grin on his face, clutching a bottle of wine!
Moving on to 2011, and just after I had been made redundant (for the second time in my working life) I received a phone call from a recruitment agency I had signed up with: “Hi Lawrence, how do you fancy doing a few days’ work for Alex Salmond and the SNP?.” As a non-nationalist supporter, I must confess to being astonished at the question, so I wasn’t quite sure what to say? Nevertheless, I was intrigued at the prospect, so I said yes. Figuring it might be an interesting addition to my evolving CV. So, you could say that for a few days at least, Alex Salmond paid my wages.
What I was required to do was quite straightforward: I was to phone up many members of the SNP, and remind them to go out and vote, as Mr Salmond was relying on them.
It all went relatively smoothly, but then I called up one member (let’s just call him Jock Tamson) to elicit his support. I initially said the following words: “Hello, I’m calling on behalf of Alex Salmond and the SNP, could I speak with Mr Tamson?” His wife quickly explained that he was having his dinner, but before I could utter another word, she shouted out – “Jock, Jock, I’ve got Alex Salmond on the phone for you!” I then overheard the weary and slightly annoyed voice of Jock (not exactly crying from the wilderness) but from his kitchen: “For ****sake, he’s already got my vote, what more does he want?”
While attempting to suppress my laughter, I explained to them both, that unfortunately, I wasn’t Alex Salmond! An encounter that still makes me smile to this day.
So, farewell to Alex Salmond; he was ultimately never crowned the ‘King of Scotland’, but he held another title that possibly meant just as much to him.
He was once voted ‘The Curry King of Scotland’! ■
Alec Salmond at jackdraws
anything.com
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He was wearing his own suit, his own glasses and didn’t scrounge free tickets for a Proclaimers concert!
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