Editor at Large

Posted by in February's Magazine

“Let me tell you a story,” said the tall, bearded guy on stage.

“When we agreed to play here, we stipulated that most of the tickets should be made available on the night and they weren’t. There are about 100 people freezing in a queue outside and the venue is trying to charge them £6 to go into an upstairs lounge to watch us via video link on a black and white TV, a fuckin’ black and white TV! I can tell you one thing… Frightened Rabbit will never, fucking never, play Cabaret Voltaire again.” (It later transpired that the band were late onstage because the singer had been out serenading the frozen hordes.)



The trouble did not stop there, earlier, when I went to the bar I was confronted by my worst venue/nightclub bête noire. I asked for two pints of lager, the barman stared at me blankly and pointed to the (dreaded) towels over every beer font, “sorry we’re having problems with the refrigeration, we only have bottled beer” – the same hoary old excuse coughed up every time. Although, in fairness, that excuse can sometimes be ‘problems with the gas or cellar’.

The problem is money-grabbing bastards. There is nothing wrong with any of the bar’s ‘workings’. Bottles require less bar staff and aid quicker dispensation. We order two bottles of beer each. Cost? £18, yes, EIGHTEEN POUNDS! So, if we are average drinkers, in a venue for four hours, we could have, say, the equivalent of five pints in bottles… For the princely sum of £90! To put that in context, if those ‘malfunctioning’ beer taps had been on, our evenings drinking would have cost less than £40. Nightlife robbery.

We then join the throng, which is not so much a crowd as a giant moshpit, (the singer later goes on a forum to say they had asked for ticketing to be kept to a level where everyone could get a decent view) and the band burst into life. A few minutes in my mate turns to me mortified, “the girl in front is accusing me of inappropriate behaviour, she says I keep coming into contact with her.” 400 people sardined into a cellar, how could they not touch? He spent the rest of the gig trying to keep an, impossible, foot of space between them. Good night then? Nope

One response to “Editor at Large”

  1. Billy Elliot says:

    This is very nice post. Really to collect ticket at the time of to enjoy any play is very messy.Good story and expression is very attarctive

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